ageingted
Junior Member
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Posts: 86
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Post by ageingted on Dec 24, 2021 4:30:10 GMT
In the past, I would put up a link to the ginchy Kate Bush Christmas Special, but here's something for anyone who feels cheated by Kickstarter's shameful lack of bonus footage offered to Jangling Man backers. We'll just do our own bonus footage here at the pub, eh? Come back with me to Christmas 2012 at the Colchester Arts Centre, where the I Hear Voices Theatre Company presented Bentley Strangetrousers and the Twelve Plagues of Christmas. Special guest M. Newell appears halfway through in the role of a British 'sleeper agent' disguised as a Jewish Santa Claus complete with wife and children, all of whom fare very badly indeed.
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Post by diskojoe on Dec 24, 2021 14:05:22 GMT
Thank U Very Much pierogi, oops, wrong forum,Aging Ted, & A Merry Chrimble & A Gear New Year to you & yours
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ageingted
Junior Member
I had no message and the message was..
Posts: 86
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Post by ageingted on Dec 28, 2021 2:50:06 GMT
Some more bonus footage - this appears at first glance to be a performance by an XTC tribute band at a convention in Swindon in 2005. However, the first 52 minutes are in fact an uncredited performance by the Guv - starting out with just guitar and finishing with the tribute band backing him for a couple of numbers. Tragically unappreciated on YouTube, but then they should have mentioned Martin's participation!
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ageingted
Junior Member
I had no message and the message was..
Posts: 86
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Post by ageingted on Dec 30, 2021 21:34:01 GMT
Just in time for New Year's Eve, the story of how Martin stopped drinking in 2016, just after his eye surgery. He stopped smoking permanently in 2011, but I can't say whether he still indulges in the odd demon drink. What Happened When I Gave Up AlcoholAnd for those of us who do indulge, the Guv has something to say about that too. OLD NEWELL’S TEN POINT HANGOVER GUIDE 1/10 Vague fuzziness. Hard to distinguish from normal bad morning. 2/10 More fuzzy. Need to drink orange. Very slight aching at back of head. 3/10 Definitely a slight headache. Dog bark irritates. Need coffee. Gone after walk. 4/10 As above but slightly more so. Takes bike ride to cure. Gone by 11 O’clock. 5/10 Need a pint of tea and an Anadin. Unwise to smoke straight away. Gone by lunchtime. 6/10 A burning desire to kill Chris Evans upon switching on the radio. Raging thirst. Innards twitchy. Hate telephone. Takes about an hour to get going. Still hanging around after lunch. Don’t smoke till ten a.m. 7/10 The last stage where it is dealable with. Two Anadin required. Dog puts own safety in danger by barking. Strenuous excercise required but hard to commence. Writing possible but slow. Speech halting and resentful. Needs a pint at five O’clock. 8/10 Ooohh. Painkillers must be taken with dry bread and a pint of water before getting out of bed. Dog now out of danger when barking, because violent movement is impossible. Small light chores possible by lunchtime. Don’t stray too far from toilet before midday. Civilised speech possible by 1.pm. Best have a pint of Stella or a port and brandy as soon as well enough to walk. No smoking until half way down Stella. 9/10 Phone for help. Lying in bed imagining cancer. Can’t eat. Dog sniffs worriedly round edge of bed. Head feels like blood in tiny braincells has been replaced with Tabasco sauce. Radio makes no sense, even if strong enough to turn it on. Repentant and full of remorse even though no recollection of previous evening. First visit to toilet feels like a rectal prolapse. Piss looks like Co-Op limeade. Slightest movement causes waves of nausea. Swear never to do it again. Weak lager must be brought to bedside by sympathetic friend after first evening meal of soup and bread. 10/10 The Big One. Lying with head hung over edge of bed crying and yacking into a bucket. Painkillers have no effect since they can’t be kept down. Spinning and nausea. Praying and apologising to God, in between bouts of vomiting. Can’t sit up. Beg partner to enquire about hospice bed availability. First visit to toilet nothing happens since all solids left the body the previous evening. No recollection of anything at all, let alone previous evening. Well enough to drink again, but only Girlsberg lager, after 48 hours.
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Post by Chespo on Dec 31, 2021 21:32:01 GMT
I've aged out of any indulgences that would yield higher than 1/10; feeling lousy the next day just isn't worth it anymore. Happy newell year to all!
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Post by diskojoe on Jan 1, 2022 13:11:52 GMT
It was only mixed nuts & Coke for me last night while watching Oasis at Knebworth. Happy New Year's everyone!
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